To know & be known.

     Here is a fact for you. Do you have that one phrase that always creeps its way into your daily pleas to God? To know & be known. That's mine. Reoccurring in over 90% of my original prayers is the quality saying: Father, I want to know & be known. The repetition occurred today as I was riding in the back seat of my mom's car, heading out to spend the day in the middle of green grass & wooden paths. Lost in my own thoughts, the direction shifted from my relationship with my heavenly Father to the relationships I build on earth. It was my Father's nudge of my shoulder, you need to open up your heart & make yourself known. 

     He took me to my adolescent years, years after I moved to a different school. After transferring to a strange group of people I soon enough would call my friends, I lost touch with many kids I grew up with from my old school. When I would see them again, I was the girl that always pretended I didn't see you, avoiding eye contact at all costs. My present roommate was one of those close friends. The other day sitting in the kitchen with our coffees, she reminisced over her memories of me after I had moved. She was in a wedding, where I knew the groom & she knew the bride. Upon coming up to say hi to me while I stood with my church friend, she told me I gave her the cold shoulder. Hurt, she exclaimed that I had gotten mean. I didn't do it out of ignorance, I just wanted to go unnoticed. I didn't want to be known.

     Jumping over a century, He brought me to my recent search for a church family. I saw myself hiding in the shadow of a friend, Keith, as he mingled among other church friends at Tuesday night's small group we have been attending for a couple weeks. I see the girls around my age smiling at me, trying to make small talk. The second they walk towards me, my walls grow 5 1/2 feet high (I'm short) & thicker than brick. I don't want to be known. Oh, sure I want to know. I know Ariel goes to school far away, Amanda sings on stage every Sunday, Jon got a new job, & David came to my old church once with my brother. If they want to tell me their deepest thoughts & dark past secrets, I am all ears. I am a really good listener, after all. Also, I can give you quality, biblical advice. But them wanting to know mine? So, uh, what about that weather...

I don't allow myself to be known. I am scared to make myself known. 

     Two blogs & I've already downed two fears. You all must think I am the biggest child ever. I am. But just as the Lord beckons me to come, experience a new day, dancing in the midst of His beauty, He whispers to me where the treasures in the fields are hidden. He wants me to invite others to know me, & the intricate features He's woven into my being. Paul knew the importance of making yourself known. In 2 Corinthians he  pleads that as a fair exchange, that they, the people, God's children, 'open wide [their] hearts also'. When you allow people to see your heart, you reveal the light. The glowing reflection of Christ. When they see your heart, the see His spirit he entrusted you. 

     To wrap it up, in Colossians chapter 1, Paul went on to write, "He (Christ) is the image of the invisible God,..." Christ was God in the flesh. We are called to be Christ-like, the city on a hill. Don't hide the beauty of your soul. Be known.